Switch Off

When online love makes life unbearable

This is transgressive flash fiction. Tread carefully…

Created by the Author in Nightcafe

The affair took possession of me before I’d even realised the depth of my involvement.

By that time, it was already too late. No going back. Why would I? He was the embodiment of all I’d ever longed for.

Online lust turned into online want, need, and finally I became consumed by the obsessive existence of long distance love. My mind, body, heart and soul sucked in by unreality, leaving me unfit to function.

Unhinged… Drowning in our relationship.

My existence pinned to the computer. To his profile. Hardly sleeping. Eating on the hop. Never going out. Getting home deliveries.

Afraid to switch off the phone or close my laptop.

When he went to the bathroom, I would break out in a sweat. Petrified something may happen, and we’d lose contact. To pass the time, I’d glance out the window at the rain lashing onto grey slabs, and tears would streak down my sallow cheeks. Then, when he returned, I’d wipe them dry. And we’d laugh… For a moment.

That was our life. His and mine.

Even though we lived over 10,000 miles apart, mentally it seemed as if we were sitting in the same room. Yet physically, there was no release.

No climax.

No end.

Sleep was fragmented, but always with the phone or laptop at my side.

The days morphed into weeks. A bomb ticking, about to explode. Constantly together — yet alone. In a wired state of alert.

The bills piled up on my bedsit doormat. The bin in the tiny yellow kitchenette overflowed with rubbish; the stench overpowering when the heating was on.

I believed love was supposed to be a joyous gift. Not a painful misery. Enough was enough. If we couldn’t be together in this world, there was no choice but to head on to the next.

Determined to carry it through, my love and I made a pact and set an imminent date for a threesome with the grim reaper.

My body calmed, understanding we would remain connected — until death do us part.

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The above story is 339 words. I write a lot of flash fiction. I never used to as I always wondered how could I fit everything in? But it is a fact that many writers use far more words than are actually needed. In flash fiction, every word must count.

I also wrote the above story again as an exactly 100 word (including the title) drabble. That really nails the crux of your story to the wall… You can find it by clicking here.

Let me know which tale you prefer.

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